The Scientific Side of Self-Pity

San Diego State University proudly boasts of being named the #1 small research university in the country for the last 4 years. I’m starting to wonder if the athletics program at SDSU has something to do with that. Because SDSU athletics has unknowingly ventured into the scientific field and the results are both sound and logical. Granted, the AD’s office hasn’t formulated any groundbreaking scientific data inside the AAC, but I can’t think of a better example of an organism that adheres more to the laws of physics than these guys. They are their very own scientific research project.

Maybe it’s because their home field used to be called Jack Murphy stadium. Maybe former San Diego mayor Dick Murphy has something to do with it. It could even be “McMurphy’s” fault, the local pub just a few blocks from campus.  But San Diego State University has always been a strict adherent to good ol’ Murphy’s Law.  And you don’t have to be future French bio-chemist Mehdi Cheriet to know what Murphy’s law is. It’s the epigram that states, “If anything can go wrong, it will.”

And that idiom seems to have been the constant theme at SDSU for as long as I can remember. Today’s latest example is former Aztec head coach Brady Hoke’s departure for snowier pastures at the University of Michigan.

You can’t blame Brady for leaving. After all, he has stated several times to private and public sources that Michigan was his dream destination. But it seemed like so many unfortunate things had to happen just to leave SDSU without the only head coach to lead them to a bowl win since Don Coryell in 1969.

Rich-Rod, Harbaugh, Miles, Strong and whoever else all found a way to get themselves out of the picture so Hoke could find his way to pose front and center, donning the maize and blue.

I know every fan-base goes through this kind of thing. The sky seems to be falling on half the schools in the country. And if it’s not this thing, its another and so forth.  So who knows?  This might not turn out so bad, and SDSU’s future could be as bright as ever. For example, I’m pretty sure we still have an undefeated basketball team, who happens to be ranked #6 in the country.  And our team enjoys the advantage of playing in front of one of the most fanatical home-courts in college basketball.

And so far nothing has gone terribly wrong for our beloved hoops squad.  So I’m not going to lament over a possible curse.

Now, if Brian Carlwell gets caught stealing a fridge, Tim Shelton leaves the team to sign with Death Row, Malcolm Thomas jaywalks into oncoming traffic, Mehdi is deported after being exposed as a French spy and Kawhi Leonard leaves our planet to go back to his home on Pandora, then I might start going off on a whole “we’re cursed” rant.

But for now, I would just like to acknowledge that SDSU is not immune to the laws of the universe. And if any physics professor at San Diego State is having a hard time explaining Murphy’s law to his hungover and sunburned  GE students, he doesn’t need to look any farther than our very own Athletics Department for a perfect example.

“Life isn’t fair” has never sounded so scientific.


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